Levels of Lush

Alcoholism comes in different flavours.

I have friends who have been classed as alcoholics from time to time by other friends.
As a habitual drinker I always somewhat dismissed these claims, since I know these people do not feel the absolute need for drink on a constant basis. They may have a ‘drinking problem’ but they’re probably not physically addicted to the substance in the way I have been – between habitually drinking and regularly binging.

First friend is Jewel.
Jewel is a binge drinker. She will deny sleep and continue drinking for stretches of 30 hours. Her problem is that she can’t stop once she starts and as her inebriation continues her self restraint falls away. She gets obnoxious, selfish and belligerent. She decides the music and the volume (almost always as loud as it can go) and she demands full attention and centre stage.
She can also get messy and destructive in this mode and unfortunately for her, this has lead to many of our friends simply dropping her.

Conversely, sober, Jewel is indeed a jewel. An absolute pleasure to have as a friend. She can spend weeks sober and just fine without any need for the substance.
However, a ‘couple of social drinks’ is not on her radar. She will almost always demand more and more drink, to the point that she has caused an uproar upon invitation back to someone’s place after-hours if drink is not made available to her.
Also, her binge drinking is not necessarily for ‘fun’. It’s clear she is escaping the reality of some issues she can’t deal with. Alcohol affords her confidence and escapism.

Secondly is the barfly.
K-James is a typical barfly. Of course he enjoys drinking, but for him it is a byproduct of the social atmosphere of the bar scene.
He is a people-person and although on the surface his drinking is habitual it has less to do with alcohol than people suppose.
Granted, he may, under the influence, make some flawed decisions, for instance inviting girls he just met home which adversely affects his home life and that of his house mates, and aside from financial concerns that is the extent of his ‘problem’.

Example: K-James had run out of cash. I had one note myself. We sat in playing video games and drinking tea, but, as a habitual drinker I felt the need for drink.
I had enough for eight cheap cans we could share to see the evening out.
I took a trip to the shop, and arriving back with my ‘surprise’ I could tell K-James resented it. In fact I think he may only have accepted one of the beers that night before switching back to tea.
He would have preferred we take my last bit of cash to the bar and nurse one drink each for a couple of hours.

All the same, regular drinking, whether you class it as habitual or social will lead to a certain dependence on the substance.

As a habitual drinker, I am the closest of the three of us to actual alcoholism. Opposite to K-James, I forgo the expense of social drinking and drink on the cheap, home alone. And different to Jewel (although I do binge from time to time) I would require drink every evening – so much so that I could go 10 nights of consecutive drinking and not one had in another’s company.
Among the more ‘proper alcoholic’ behaviours I’ve engaged in are: frequenting different shops on different nights of the week so that the attendants don’t know that I’d drink every night, buying beer and wine so that it seems as though I am buying for two and hiding my vast amount of empty bottles when guests come over.

I am one step from the bona fide alcoholic.
On the edge of ‘functioning’ this is the person with the stash in the toilet cistern and a bottle of vodka by the bed.
Day time beverages like tea or coffee will be ‘infused’ in secret, and all this is done merely to function on a level considered ‘normal’.
These drinks during the day are medicine to take an edge off and keep the shakes at bay.
My uncle got to this point and subsequently joined Alcoholics Anonymous. He’s been ‘clean and dry’ years now.

Finally there is the bum. The people I see in the streets around me (I live in the city) and dread I could one day become.
These are possibly homeless, impoverished and disheveled individuals who must keep drinking every conscious hour of the day.
They often purchase each drink singularly – the strongest cheapest stuff they can find, and roam with that can of cider until it’s finished. At the end of the day they may make a purchase of a few before alcohol tills close for the night, but I’m not even sure many of them get to that point.
Presumably drink is at the root of their poverty. They have hit rock bottom and have given up, figuring drink might make that rock feel a little less cold and hard.

Personally I feel it’s important to note these differences. Both in terms of oneself and pin pointing where on this slippery slope you might be and also in judging others.
It’s far too easy to call someone an alcoholic because they get rowdy and cause problems when drunk once a fortnight, or because they spend much of their time in a bar over a draught ot two.
Sure, they may have a problem with the substance, and are abusing it and they probably should be addressing it, but as a person who has downed a bottle of wine before meeting friends at a bar, just to feel ‘okay’, I take exception on their behalf.
A drink problem can easily lead to alcoholism, and all of this is a sensitive area, particularly when confronting a drinker about their habit and behaviour, but, even if doing so on one’s own, it’s important to recognise the actual nature and extent of the problem before addressing it

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